I'm not asking for attention. I'm very upset. It's hard being here, but don't get me wrong...I don't want to be any place else. Life originated here and I would always love to remain it that way.
It hurts immensely and I'm taking it all out on myself, luckily my sanity keeps me on the right track. 

I'm so fed up with being hurt for no good reason. It's not fair anymore. It's over & life should have transitioned.

Fuck life for making it more complicated than that. 

I can't cry (?) for some reason...I'm just a fail. Tomorrow is going to be hell boring. I'm scared of the weight I'll gain, the thoughts that will take over me, the feeling of helplessness.
I want that constant companion who just understands and would just always be willing to be my company. But I think I'm just asking for too much...maybe just asking for the normal to come again. But it's not good for you Listy. Get over it.